I have completed almost two weeks of internal medicine. So far, I am enjoying it quite a bit. I still feel out of my element…there are so many complex physiological, pharmacological, logistical elements of medicine that I will never come close to understanding. But, I am really glad for what I have learned so far. I hope I will learn enough to be a good oral surgeon. I want to be able to take good care of my patient's health, not just focus on their teeth.
Things have also been much less busy. I start at 8 am and come home often before 5 pm. It has been really nice to have some extra time and I suddenly don’t feel so bad for all of the things I can’t get a handle on in my life. My house has been a little cleaner, I have been exercising more, cooking more, taking care of Abe more, practicing piano, etc, all things I usually have a very difficult time doing. Today, I was even BORED when I got home. I don’t remember the last time I was bored --usually I am so glad to be doing nothing or have so much to get caught up on, I feel guilty rather than bored. Ha ha.
I also realize how selfish I have been. When you are working 10 or more hours a day, weekends, nights, it is so hard to find time for much of anything—or to have the energy when you do. I have found myself becoming very selfish of my time and my space. I realize now that no matter how busy, I should still find time to be a friend, to help someone out, to be kind. I am sorry I haven’t been this way to you.
I hope I can be better, even when things pick back up.