Saturday, May 2, 2009

Dream on...


I am a very vivid dreamer. Almost every night I have incredibly weird dreams that I almost always remember in the morning. And, unfortunately, they are almost all bad dreams. I can hardly understand when people say things like, "Oh, I was having such a good dream but I couldn't get back to sleep to finish it." Besides the fact that I have to wake up and drag myself out of bed, I am usually relieved to be awake from my dreams. I remember having one experience where I wanted to continue the dream, but that was because it was so horrific I thought it would make an interesting book if I could just get to the end (as if dreams have definitive endings) and find out what happens but finally told myself to wake up because it was just to scary. I even remember thinking to myself, "No, this is too scary. Wake up." I did.


When I moved to Iowa I particularly found my dreaming upsetting. I would wake up feeling the room spinning and unsure where I was or what orientation I was in in my bed. I didn't know if I was back home in Utah or in Honduras or in Iowa. I guess a lot of moving in a short period had me confused. This is when I first started really noticing my sleep disturbances. I still wake up after about 45 minutes of sleep each night stressed about something I forgot to do that is of huge eternal consequences. I still can't figure out what, despite making attempts to write it down when I figure it out (only to have strange scribbles in the morning). Poor Abe has to deal with me and my strange mid-night rantings.


My mom claims I had many nights as a child where I would wake up screaming bloody murder. I remember a few of these. One time I remember seeing a cartoonish face on the wall egging me on with a childish, "na-na-na-na-na-na." The strange thing about many of my dreams to me is that I am asleep enough to act or think very strangely but awake enough to remember, often realize I am being silly, but asleep enough to get frustrated when Abe (or someone else) is questioning me.


Am I a complete weirdo? Is anyone else like this? Do I have a sleep disorder or a boogey-man under my bed only I can sense? I really don't know.


I have a lot of funny dream stories I could elaborate with but this is very long.

4 comments:

Rachel said...

This is so strange but I, too, have this problem. My strange and bad dreams often involve waking at some loud bang and noise but Derek never seems to hear it. I always wake up out of breath. I also often wake up and see strange windings of smoke that are dark and thick. They always seem to know where they are going and I often wake up fearing something is on fire. I rarely (and like never) have calm or good dreams, always bad. Maybe we are paranoid or sensing impending doom?

Colt said...

i have some pretty weird dreams but not to the extent of your dreams. I started writing my dreams down in a word document about a month ago, and try my best to keep it up to date.

Suz said...

I do remember the "night terrors". It used to scare me to death to wake up to a screaming child. I think it is not a totally unusual phenonom...
You could try doing relaxing/breathing techniques when you get into bed and think of good fantasies you can control until you fall asleep. Maybe it would steer your dreams in a healthier direction.

Chelsea said...

I have totally weird dreams every night too. They aren't usually scary but they are definitely weird as Brian can attest too. They get worse when I'm pregnant. And even worse when i'm backed up on sleep, like when Ethan was a newborn. Maybe you need more sleep? Which means more bad dreams, and the cycle goes on...